Christmas Eve...Day 10.

Oh thank goodness it has been a better day today.  Must of had the 9 day blues yesterday.  First with my weigh in and then later I pigged out...well as much as you can after you have just had surgery for a gastric band!!!!

I just felt like more than liquids and was really sick of those...even with the new soups I made.  I was also feeling sorry for myself and taunting myself with the....'Why did you do this before Christmas and your holidays?'and 'Poor you you can't eat anything decent...' .  Really all I wanted was some of the Creamy Chicken casserole that I blended up last night for the mushy stage.

Well, I was making the lunches for my daughters and their friends who were over for a play and I saw the peanut butter jar ( a MAJOR) weakness of mine and then the teaspoon just kinda fell in there and then into my mouth.  OMG...yummmmmmmmmm...so I had a few more.  Later I begged DH to go and get the shopping so I could have some more ( in secret) plus 3 choccies that a girlfriend gave me.  Well serves me right but I got a tiny pain in my chest from the peanut butter...scared the sh*t out of me!!!

It is scary how quickly we can fall into bad habits even when we can't really eat!!!  But sneak eating/ bingeing is a problem for me and something I will have to work on when the real eating begins!!! Anyway this morning all is good and it is another day...and I am not going to get bogged down by the guilt!!  I made some chicken and sweet corn soup and then cooked for Christmas day.  The girls had a ball.  It is so exciting wathcing the girls get all excited for Christmas....my youngest just begged me to be able to open something....or just tell her what one of the presents were.  Luckily a friend came over and they opened their girfts from them.

This is a picture of my scars from today.  (Don't freak out at the red long one...it is the tiny scar in the middle that is from the surgery.  The long ones are a reaction I had from the steri strips...blisters etc and the red stuff is mecurochrome to dry them out)

Sorry to subject you all to my gross stomach but I wanted to record the scars....you can't even see the one in my belly button as my tummy hangs down.  I don't think the scars will be a problem but am so looking forward to seeing a much better looking stomach!!!  Who wouldn't???

Finally I got a surprise in the mail today....some books I ordered early this week have arrived.

These are from a dietician in Brisbane and have loads of helpful hints to change your eating after a gastric band.  So more info to read and lots of tips to get me on my way to changing my lifestyle for good.  Yippee.

Measurements in cm

14/12/09

Neck -  37

Left arm  -  34

Right arm  -  34

Chest  -  123  ( I hate my big chest as I have a broad back and never had boobs until after my second DD)

Waist  -  119

Hips  -  127

Legs - no measured

23/12/09

Neck  -  35.5

Left arm  -  33.5

Right arm  -  33

Chest  -  118 (yay 5 cms!!!)

Waist  -  115 (yippee 4 cms)

Hips  -  124

Left thigh  -  65

Right thigh  -  64

Total cms lost:  15 cm in just over a week.

Well I just want to wish all my new bandster friends a really enjoyable Christmas ...no matter what stage you are at and a wonderful New Year.  I know there will be a lot less of us next year...he he he.   I look forward to our journey together.

A special HI to my followers...thanks for tuning in...I love comments by the way ;).

We go away on Saturday for 2 weeks down the South Coast.....that will be so nice

Till next time....

GB

What the....

Ok...how do you put on a kilo (2.2lbs) overnight???  Especially when all you are eating or should i say drinking is fluids???  And mainly vegie and protein soups homemade???

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 8 Post Op...

Well whoever said that you get your energy back around Day 8 was not lying.  I would not say I am leaping tall buildings in a single bound but hey I had more energy and didn't just want to sleep all day.

 

I saw the Dr yesterday and he is happy with my healing although no swimming for the next few weeks which is a bit of a bummer considering we are going on holidays.  I saw the fill in dietician yesterday and she just confused me.  She said I could start mushies on Thursday and then solids on week 4.  After I came home I went through the material from the first dietician and she has written 2 weeks on liquids ...so I am going to go with that because the Dr also mentioned in hospital that he wanted me on liquids for 2 weeks too.

These are the cool plate and bowl I got to help me with the portion sizes.  She the green little circle at the front of the plate????  That is the size of the band (perhaps with fill?) that the food needs to get through.  You can but these off the web too http://www.greatideas.net.au/

 

Besides everything I am still staying full with liquids although am super sick of the milk type shakes.  So as I said I had more energy today so I made a creamy chicken casserole tonight for the family and pureed up a few serves to freeze for the next week and I also made 2 soups... a kumera and lentil soup and a cauliflower & cheese one which I got of Mrs Woofarkinhoo's blog.  Thank you it was beautiful.  So at least I have a few things to keep me on the straight and narrow for the next few days. 

A few of my steri strips came off my wounds today and I am amazed at how small they are.  One is gaping so I re-did another steri strip over it but the best news of all is that the big cut is in my belly button so you can't see it.....not that I will be wearing a bikini...ever ...but still!!!  I will take a pic to share.

I have also been thinking about an entry on Catherine's Blog about the goals she made to help her get to the weight loss she had achieved so far.  I need to write down some things that will help me lose my weight and reach my goals.  In the book The Lapband Solution by Dr Paul O'Brien which I read in hospital he has a list of Golden Rules for Diet and Exercise which I thought was a good place to start.

The Eight Golden Rules

1. Eat three or less meals a day - hopefully easy when the band is working and filled
2. Do not eat anything between meals - again this will depend on fills I think
3. Eat slowly and stop when no longer hungry - having some experience already how the band will help here
4. Focus on nutritious foods - I am really trying to do this at the moment and will do because I will be  eating less and still want my energy
5. Avoid calories containing liquids - wine will be a toughie and needs it's own special plan
6. Exercise for at least 30 minutes a day - easy when I am not on crutches
7. Be active throughout eat day - again easy when out of boot and crutches.  I walk kids to school and have an active job
8. Always keep in contact with your Dr/ Clinic - should be a no brainer

 So I have some limitations holding me back at present but I definately have some focus to help me through the next part of my journey.  I must say that I am already seeing the focus towards really nutritous foods whilst on liquids.  I have cut back on my tea so that I can get other things in and when I have something I make sure it has protein as well as vegies.

Well off to read some more of those inspirational blogs.  I try to read them from start to finish so I can capture the whole journey...thanks to everyone who has been sharing their story....

GB

A bit Bunged up.....

Ok....perhaps a lot bunged up!!!!  Yep this post may come under TMI...so you have been forwarned.

Yesterday we went to my SIL's for Christmas lunch.  I decided to go because I have been rather bored of late (after resting my foot and now the surgery) but was concerned about the pressure to eat something.   No need to worry as I just claimed I was suffering from an upset stomach...which is kinda true.....my tummy is a little upset!!!!

I just drank my water and had a cup of vegie and chicken homemade soup and an Up & Go when no one was watching.  Well I have to say that the milk drinks are upsetting my tummy a bit so when the mains came out nothing truly appealed to me!!!  I did have some ice cream and custard but that made me feel really stuffed and bloated.

By the time we left i was in a bit of pain with bloating which then started to make my shoulder hurt.  By the time I got home I just wanted to lie down and I did with my hot pack and I promptly fell asleep.  I think that the wind from being constipated is starting to back up a little now and although I have had some minor 'brake throughs' I really need a major one!!!  I am definately off to the chemist today!!!

Other than that I feel ok...still very tired though....hoping this is normal????  Off to the Dr today for my post op check up which is a little earlier than usual because of Christmas and then I am on holidays on Saturday...I can't believe how fast the time has gone.  The girls went to work with their dad today so after I venture up the shops I will get wrapping their pressies especially those Santa ones!!!

I am a little hungrier now but I really don't think I could eat anything even if I wanted to anyway.....I am very mindful that the Dr wants me on liquids for 2 weeks and plan to stick to that.  A cup of homemade soup fills me up anyway.

Finally I just wanted to wish Yana all the best for her operation....see you on the other side!!!

GB

PS: I so totally forgot to mention that I am 7.2kg down today and it is making a difference!!!  My face looks more human...not a bloated ball and my clothes feel a little looser.  I have also already lost 5% of my total body weight....the band (or surgery) rocks!!!!

Thinking...

So this morning I woke up after a good sleep and just can't believe that I have LB (LapBand, Lil Darlin', Lil Bitch etc...) actually inside me.  I have managed to keep it from everyone....my kids included. It just seems so surreal. But I suppose it is really there (I have the scars) and after reading so many inspiring Blogs I am excited for my journey to begin...to see how my story unfolds.

We are off tomorrow for Christmas with the in-laws but as I am feeling so lethargic and unable to eat anything DH and I think it might be better for me to stay home than to answer 20 odd questions about why I am not eating.  (Remember that only he and my BFF know about LB).  During the course of that day I was wondering what people will actually think when I will eat less or am on fluids and I emailed my BFF about it.  She wrote back that of course they won't guess....who would have ever thought that I would get this done???  Not her....no way....she thinks I should just claim giardia or food poisoning.

Now for all the American/ Candian readers I have some questions...if you don't mind????

• What is Funnel cake?
• What is a gram or graham?? cracker???
• What is Evoo???  (A spray oil???)
• And what is cilantro???

And finally after reading loads of blogs I was wondering why vegies don't seem high on the food list???  Am I missing this somewhere or are they hard to eat???  I love my vegies.....

Till next time...

6 kilos down...

Yay!!!  Weighed myself this morning and I am 6 kg down as of this morning since I started the pre-op diet.  I can feel the difference around my back near my bra but the top of my abdomen is still pretty swollen so hard to say there. 

I made some chicken and vegie soup yesterday and am really enjoying that...I am a little sick of sweet shakes.  Having said that, not heaps is going down but I have given up my cup of tea (or should I say teas!!!) so that I can at least try and get some more nourishing drinks down.

This is a picture of my band being placed around my actual stomach during surgery...how cool!!!

The only thing I am finding hard is being so tired.  I was asleep again early last night and my actual tummy muscles feel like I have done a few rounds with Mike Tyson.  My foot is super tender too...at least I am dounle re-couperating!!!!  Other wise I am going along great guns.

I am loving reading lots of blogs from begining to end and wondering how my story will turn out....thanks for sharing your stories with us all ladies.

GB

Day 3 Post Op...

Well I think I overdid it yesterday!!!  I went to my childrens School Liturgy and last day and by the end of that (about 2 hours) my shoulder was really hurting.  I popped 2 more panadol and then ventured up to the classrooms to collect the girls after which we went for lunch at the local club. 

I ordered the pumpkin and vegie soup and had a few mouthfuls but in all honesty really struggled.  I was full and sore.  I was ready to go home.  Funny no-one noticed how little I ate or how out of it I was...so all good there.  I then came home and fell asleep from about 3pm to 7.30pm.  DH brought me up some juice which was heaven as I have a bit of a yucky taste in my mouth and then around 10.30pm I was out till 8.30 am this morning, although I did wake up for a loo break and weighed myself on the scales.  By morning I was up by 400gms (.88lb).

This is our new Blender which is very similiar to the Magic Bullet and my hair vitamins as reccommended by Dash

So this morning I whipped up a vanilla Optifast with a teaspoon of coffee in it, in our new Wizard Blender (which we all just love).  I bought it on the way to the hospital for all my liquids and purees.  I then dropped the kids off to a friend's while I went to the Sports Dr for my foot.  I have been in a boot for around 14weeks and on crutches for 12 weeks and today I went back for another check up and blood injection.

The Dr takes blood from my arm and re-injects it into my heel to speed up healing.  I have to lie on my tummy for this (which I was worried about!!!) but it all went ok.  I have to stay off my foot for the next 2 weeks and hopefully in the next 5 weeks will be out of the boot.  FINGERS CROSSED

These are the 2 books I have read and found to be very helpful.  The link to the Helen Bauzon Book 'The Gastric Band Nutrition Essential' is at theside bar on my blog and 'The Lap Band Solution' I borrowed from the library on the morning of my surgery.

The rest of today I have been resting.  I must say I am struggling to get in all the reccommended fluids and find the milk drinks a little slimy.  That said I am doing the best I can and it is earlier days after all.

Thanks to Debi who said she thought I looked a good weight...I can assure you that my very minimum to lose is  25 kg (55lbs) with my min ideal around 35 kg (77lbs) down and if I get there I will re-evaluate. ( I am trying to be very realistic)  I posted a head shot of me at 78 kg (172 lbs) but I was doing loads of exercise there but it will give me something to aim to.  I am not ready to post my before photos although I have taken some.

Lastly, Dash's hair loss post scared me.  I am not sure why some of you are losing your hair???  I would really hate that but hey then I hate most things about myself so jusy another thing to work on!!!  However, as tired as I am it did scare me enough to go and buy those vitamins today and take my first one too.....LOL

Well that's it for now....going to work on jazzing my blog up a bit!!!

What to call my Blog...???

Just another quick post....I am struggling with the name of my Blog.  I started with 'Girl Bandit' but have now changed it to 'Ramblings from the other side'  but am tossing around 'Ramblings from the banded side'

What do you think???

Surgery Day (Getting the Monkey off my Back)...

Well, I tried to go back to bed on the morning of my surgery but decided I would rather keep reading Catherine's Blog as I was so excited.  At 6am I ate some toast and had a cup of tea but then realised I had not weighed myself and there was no point now since I had eaten and drunk  water since 3.30 am.

DH and I then got the kids ready for school and went to their parent teacher interviews.  Both the teachers were highly complimentry of our girls and doesn't that make your heart just swell.!!!!  We then headed up the street to finish off the Christmas shopping as even before the op I have needed help because I am on crutches.

Once finished we headed over to the hopsital which is about an hour away.  I choose a Dr  and clinic about an hour away because I liked the idea of the whole team approach and also there is NO WAY I would run into anyone I know over that way.  I know alot of people and my mother was a theatre nurse and as she does not knowI am having the op, I didn't want to risk the chance of running into anyone she knew.

So we arrived a little early and DH had some lunch (I wasn't even hungry...just thirsty) and then had to wait 1/2 hour to get into the room.  I was a little dissappointed to find I had a share room and that the patient was not even getting banded.  DH then left as he had to get the girls from school and I don't want them to know about this for the time being.

The nurses came to admit the girl in the bed next to me and OMG can you believe it but they ask her to step on the scales and she says 'Oh I have not weighed myself since I was 11!!!!' She is around 28...WTF???  As yep she is TINY. Even worse they then all start going on about how she should put on weight and she is going oh am I underweight blah blah blah.....At this point I want to run because I don't want them to know what I am having done (Lucky her mother assumes it is for my foot!!!).  After a quick text to my only friend who knows about the band and I have calmed down.  Her advice was to pretend I had turrets and start yelling out "Shut the F*** up" I would never see them again anyway...LOL.  I refrained.

This is me checking in at the hospital

Then they come to admit me, take some blood, do an ECG and give me my pre- meds (heaven!!) and then they put some betadine in my belly button which burned until surgery...weird.  She slao never said anything about the banding out loud.  She said discretly "I think you know what you are having done"  Wasn't that nice.  The worst bit???  I go to put on my nightie and find that I have left it at home!!!  Derr....

So for the next 4 and 1/2 hours I lay around reading "The LapBand Solution" by Dr Paul O'Brien which I heard about from Dash's Blog and had the good sense to borrow from the library on the way to the hopsital.  It was great to have something relevant to pass the time as my mags were not cutting it as I was so excited and consumed by the band.

Finally at about 5.45 pm I am wheeled off the theatre.  I told the guy who came to take me away that I was just about to roll myself up to theatre!!!!  Then I had to wait again until I was taken into the side room for my anethesist.  It was here that the lovely nurse Jane told me I wasn't that big...how nice.  I took this as a compliment and told her about my life long battle with the weight and she told me how great Dr Taylor was!!!

Paloma, the anethesist, then came and saw me and told me all about what the drugas were etc.  I have had many ops and basically knew what to expect and as my mum is a nurse and I am totally into anything medical ...I truly love looking around the theatre and having a good old chat.  Jane said it was great to see someone so excited!!!

So in I go with all the gadgets hanging off me, even my head!!!! and they attach me up to more.  I am telling them there is no way to escape now even if I want!!!!  I then tell Dr T that he better not be too tired for MY op and he had better do a good job.  It is 6.30pm by now!!!!  They all laugh.

Next thing you know I am awake on the table and it is over.  The first thing I notice is a super sore throat...funny I have never had that before.  Then I am wheeled to recovery and I get the shakes.  The nurses are lovelyand then I can't stop chatting!!!  They all tell me I am great to look after...what a boost to the ego today!!!

I get back to the ward at 8.50 pm and for the next hour call DH and the kids and then I want to go for my walk (the DR's told me this was vital) so I buzz the nurses but it takes 1/2 for them to come to me.  They don't want me to get up so soon but I tell them I need to sleep.  More painkillers and I drift off around 10pm.

Who said you go to hospital for some rest????  Forget it!!!  They wake me at 11pm - hey I just went to sleep - for my obs and a walk.  Off I toddle with my boot and crutch and they finally make my bed.  Then I am woken at 1.30 and 4 am for more obs and again at 6am for obs and a walk.  Feeling ok...just tired and start reading my book again.

Not looking my best!!!

Anyway breakfast (or should I say) liquids arrive at 8am and I just have the tea and broth....I don't really like sweet drinks.  Throughout the night I have managed to drink nearly 1200mls of water...slowly of course.

 DH arrives shortly after and then we just need to wait for DR T and I can go home.  He came in around 9.30 -10.00am and says I am doing fine and can go home.  I need to keep the wounds covered for 2 weeks to prevent infection, drink only liquids for 2 weeks and see him in his rooms in 2 weeks.  Oh and he gives me some pictures of the band!!!  I love that and may post them later.  (I love gore...LOL) So all is great and I head dome after a quick shower.

Excuse the big bloated tummy...so attractive!!!

I can't really explain how I feel....I feel excited especially after reading so many positive blogs out there.  I feel that I may just be getting this Monkey off my back after so many years.  Yes I still have hard work to do but I am on my way.

Thank you so much to everyone for your support....to come home and see so many new comments really made me feel like I have some new friends out there to support and help me through this new chapter in my life.

I should go back to bed...

I woke up at 3.30 am and decided to get a soda & lime (will miss those because of the bubbles) and a cup of tea.  I think I am excited....it is now 5 am and I should go back to bed and get some sleep but I am addicted to the Blogs......not long for me now.

Crossing to the other side very shortly...

The hospital rang today to say that it is ok for the operation to go ahead despite the nurofen and then the anethesist rang me...she sounds just lovely.  She went through the procedure and pain relief with me and I feel very confident.  She was totally amazed by my foot injury ( I wear a heart patch on my foot and get blood injections too to stimulate repair) and hoped it would not hinder my movement after the procedure.

I won't let it!!!!  She wants me to concentrate on moving ASAP after the op, drinking water and letting them know if I feel nauseous. Have a few things planned for the morning like the last of the Chrissy shopping and paying my TAFE fees, buying some soup and maybe a blender (great idea DASH) and then we will be off to the hospital.

DH has postponed his trip after I let him know that I was nervous...although I have never experienced shoulder pain after any laproscopes the DR said I have a 50 % chance of having this pain so better to know he is here rather than in NZ.

Well off to pack a little more...wish me luck

Cold Meals, Photos, Dreaming & Nighties...

Lots of thoughts running through my head today.....am I dreaming???  Will I really be a bandster tomorrow???  I need to take some photos, measurements and get a nightie or something dececnt to wear in the hopsital.  I need to pack too.  I will grab some reading stuff when I am up the shops trying to organise my girls for their Christmas Liturgy on Wednesday.  I am also going to get some infacol and peppermint tea for the gas....advice I have picked up over the net...thank you.

I am also wondering about cold meals????  Do your meals go cold if it is taking about 1/2 an hour to eat them???  I am also wondering how I am going to keep this from my kids.  They come in all the time while I am showering and I THINK they may notice the scars and bandaids etc...need to talk to DH about this one.

Well, I have butterflies but am excited and can't weight (LOL) to get this monkey off my back....

Holy Moly...

Oh dear...been very nauseous since my Opti this morning...vomiting in my mouth.  Yuck...have decided to miss the BBQ as it is over and hours drive and I don't think I could do the drive.

On another Holy Moly note....rang the hospital and they said that because I have had Nurofen this week for my foot, that they will have to contact the Dr to see if that is OK.  WHAT THE????  I told him I was taking them daily for my foot.  I am so worried now that my op will be cancelled.....I will be furious if it is ...

Not long now...

Well 2 more sleeps until my big day...it feels like a dream.  We are off to a BBQ today and I have decided to eat lean protein and salad again today....sort of like the last supper or even Christmas as I will be on liquids on Christmas Day.  I finished work yesterday for 5 weeks...mainly to rest my foot in the hopes of being able to walk again and get off these damn crutches....but as you and I know I have sqeezed in a 'ME' procedure as well!!!

I really noticed the difference at work yesterday with just 4 kg off....not so hot and sweaty and my pants did up rather than having the top bottom undone.  Even the legs were slightly looser.  It would have been great to loose more on Opti but I wasn't the best with it...struggled...especially going from really big meals and indulgences to near nothing.  The waves of nausea and the runs didn't help either...and feeling like I was starving. To even give up the vino was a great acomplishment.  It will only get better from here.

I ordered some DVD's and a book from a dietician called Helen Bauzon who specialises in lap bands and started reading it last night...looks like it is full of great info.  I can't seem to concentrate on anything else at the moment except anything lapband or sites and blogs related to it.  Thanks to Emma and The Dash who answered my emails yesterday and allowed me to add their blogs to my sidebar...your stories are great and very inspiring...the first LapBlogs I read too...or should I say stumbled onto.  You gals are the inspiration for me starting my own Blog to record my journey.  Thanks

Ok well off to make some mini plum puddings for the BBQ today...

GB

Relief at Last

Well relief at last...rang the Dr's office today and am now only one opti a day then lean protein and low GI vegies. Thanks goodness.I have been having waves of nausea all week and really weird diarrhea too....Only 3 days to go....

I am feeling really alone atm. Hubby rang before to say he will be away Wed and Thurs so it will be me and the kids...me after an op and on crutuches because of my foot.I know he is supportive but has not even once come to an appt or info night or even looked at all the info I have to show him.

Feeling a little scared and alone as I am not telling anyone except him and my BF.

How I got here....

Well I suppose I should start with how I got here....or to this decision.

In a nutshell...I have been on and off a diet since the age of eight. In hindsight I ruined my teens with obsessing about my weight. I was a great weight!!!! To be that again.....ahhhh. But I digress. Since before 15 and after my 21st I have always battled with around 5-10kg. Not bad you say??? Except that the self loathing and hate that go with it.

After my first child I lost the 15 old kg but then they satrted to pile back on. I put on 27kg with my second child and although looking back I lost a fair bit over the next few years I topped the scale at 98kg. I stayed here for around 4 years. Then I joined up for an 8 week challenge which my sister had previously done and lost 16kg in 8 weeks. It was really hard though and I exercised ALL the time, ate no carbs or alcohol and basically starved at some points.

After Christmas I went back and lost a further 7kg...bringing my total loss (lost some before the challenge) to 29kg. Well I put on 8kg right away just by breathing food as I had been denied for so long. I hovered around here for a year or 2 finally getting back up to around 88 then down to 78 by last Christmas....then disaster struck in the form of 2009.

My mother was ill and I had suffered a foot injury (from excercise). Unfortunately this year I have watched my life slip away. No more exercise...drinking excessively, suicidal more than once. I have been in a boot and on crutches for 3 months and my weight has skyrocketed to 105kg. A gain of 27kg this year!!!

Depression and self pity have been my life this year along with constant pain which has been making me miserable and a cow to life with!!!! We (DH and I) had talked about all kinds of solutions....but I have decided to take the drastic measure of gastric banding....not so drastic as I find others who have undergone this procedure at a similar weight to me. DH was all for it as he says I am miserable when I am not at a good weight or dieting to get there. If fact this year I also hit another low point when my mind refused to diet anymore....enough it said!!! My counselor says this is me rebeling against always being told I am unacceptable by my own self talk

By the way....I don't muck around when I decide to do something. I researched Doctors and clinics and decided on Dr Taylor at the O Clinic because I like the idea of a whole team approach...surgeon, Dr's, pyshologist and dietician. I rang to make the appt and also asked them to reserve a surgery day before Christmas as I am having 5 weeks off work for my foot and if I am going to do this...then let's get it done. In fact my surgery is just 10 days after my first appt with him.

I met with Dr taylor and didn't love him at first....but loved the dietician. I attended an info night on Monday just gone (yes I have done it backwards) and feel really pleased now with my decision. I met a man who had lost 80kg in a year just by doing what he was told. I was nervous after the first consult but am now ecited for my surgery on the 14th december just four days away.

Day 10 of Optifast (last night) saw me starving and having a little cheat...an extra bar, cheese stick and some chicken crimpy biscuits but I finally was not starving. I have lost around 4kg and today am please to say that my work pants fit me....thank god....walking around with the top bottom undone is an awful feeling. Hopefuly I won't sweat to much today.

Things I am looking forward to:

• Not feeling so hot
• Not sweating so much
• Getting this monkey off my back after 32 years
• Getting back into my clothes again
• Eating normal food (just smaller amounts)
• Going out and enjoying life again (I have become a hermit this year)
• Getting off the crutches

I know this is not a quick fix but I am hoping to at least be able to say after all this, that I eat to live not live to eat!!!!

I have so much more to share.....but willleave it there for now

GB