What do you do to earn a crust??? Seriously...a living????

Hi everyone

Thanks for your ever loyal comments!!!!

Sandy Lee pointed out to me on an earlier comment that she did not know what I did for a living....to digress a little...I suppose I was very nervous about telling too much of my story on my blog for fear of discovery!!!!  I know a few of you have this fear too....my blog is for me and for others in a similar position...(that is you guys!!!) and besides my husband and very best friend in the whole world...you guys are the only ones who know about it.  Not my mum...who put me on a diet when I was 8 or my sister who was allowed to eat chocolates or lollies in front of me and who is now very trim and in fact trains with the Commando for those of you who follow the Australian version of the Bigg.est Lo.ser.

Pre kids I was a pharmaceutical sales rep for a few major players but was so wrapped to leave this postition...despite all it's entitlements and pay to have my children and be a stay at home mum.  I was very lucky to have this choice as my husband has a great job too.  During my children's first few years I did a  few odd jobs such as being a Weight Watchers Lecturer (this was actually where I met my BFF).  I also was a good scrapbooker and did lots of magazine work and also taught internet classes, was on design teams and held worksops in store for many years.

But over the years it became apparent to me and my family that anything medical would be my first fit.  My local GP even said that it was not too late for me to go to Med school...I disagree as my family come first.   Anyway I was looking at radiology or Ultrasound or even human nursing as a vocation for me once my youngest started school.

And then last year we finally talked DH into letting us get a dog...and on the day before my 40th birthday we decided to rescue a dog.....enter Oscar!!!!

This is Oscar ....at Tafe (college ) with me 2 weeks ago

We had decided on another dog which turned out unsuitable for our circumstances but the Rescue lady said that we should consider 'Oscar'  who she described as Heaven on Legs.

So the day after my fortieth we drove to Newscastle (about 3 hours from Sydney) to collect our new family member.  He has absolutely changed my life.....besides being my best friend and sitting with me throughout my foot injury...he opened up the world of Vet Nursing to me and around June of 2009 I had decided that I had found my calling.  I did a Resume drop and soon had secured a position as well as a place in the local Tafe (college) and have been studying for the last 9 months and working about 2-3 days per week in a local practice to become a fully qualified Vet Nurse.

This is my work uniform

I absolutely love my job....no day is the same and I love meeting people and helping their animals.  There are many sad cases but just as many great success stories.  I love the surgery and the medical side and as a Vet Nurse I can be in charge of anesthetic or helping a dog recover from surgery or helping a family love their pet enough to let them go.  Every day is different and every day I learn something new.  Tafe is a huge learning curve and I also love being able to help those younger than me, have confidence in themselves and quite often they lean towards me because I am unafraid to ask the questions they want answered.

In the  top photo (today) I am wearing my first uniform which got too tight on me (it is a size 18 but fits more like a 16).  My boss ended up getting me a size 20 which now swims on me.  My pants...a size 18 ...are very droopy ...and I nearly fell over them today...so it will soon be time to get a size 14...for safety sakes...or for the fact I love shopping.!!!!

They are actually bigger but you get the idea!!!!

The funny thing is that I have fought so hard to keep this job as it has kept me alive this last 9 months!!!!  As I got more and more depressed because I was in the boot shortly after starting this job, and then the crutches...I refused to give up my job which I felt gave me something to be vital for.  I am sure this and the weight I packed on only made my foot worse.  I just got to the point where I was so hot and tired at work that if I got any heavier I probably couldn't have kept up...and this is a PHYSICAL job.  Very rarely do we sit down.....

So there you have it...my new profession...what do you do for a living????

Take care

Sally  xxx

A Whine about Wine and lots of other stuff.

Before I start my whine I just want to tahnk all my followers and those who leave comments....it means so much to me.  I thought I should also let you know that I am still going to be waiting the 1/2 hour after eating until I drink as this has been working for me and I don't want to prematurely wash anything out of the pouch.  Thought I should put that out there....now for the Whine about Wine....

I have noticed myself falling into some bad habits over the last month and the main one is wine.  Does anyone else have this problem???  I was doing so much better just enjoying a glass here and there and then all that netball stuff hit the fan and it just went on from there.  I am surprised I have lost weight in the last month to be honest and after all that is what a blog is all about....being honest.  I just enjoy the taste and can't seem to stop at just one glass.  I am not ready to hit AA just yet but perhaps I need to find another drink....it has been going on for a while and is sure to hinder my weight loss efforts.  It is just that after a stressful or tiring day there is nothing better than a nice cold glass of wine....a hard habit to break I guess.  This was my mini goal for February and I was doing so well.

Well, today starts the Memorial Day Bathing Suit Challenge ( you can find out more on Kristen's blog I'm with the Band) and I figure this is a great chance to refire up and get some weight off and limit the wine too.  I would love to have lost 20kg (44 lbs) by my birthday in 22 days.  So 3.2kg (7 lbs) in 3 weeks...I think I can do it and have a plan to help me.   Back to the limited wine consumption and exercising 3 times a week, especially since I have my energy back from my recent gastro bout.

I have been quite surprised how hungry I have been over the last 2 days especially after my recent fill but today I am back to feeling not hungry at all. In fact all I have had today is a piece of cheese and 2 prawns, 1 piece of calamari and 2 insides of a pork dumpoling which all came back up!!!  And then later some Rice Crisps.  We went out for lunch as DH is off to New Zealand for a few days work.  It is one of our favourite restaurants and they had Jazz and Tapas today.  We ordered the squid , dumplings and dukkah prawns.  Not wise choices for me as the outer covering of the dumplings was very thick...and also of the others were not great choice either but DH and i had to agree on something.  Anyway, up it came in 3 different trips to the bathroom which I hate and also what a waste of money too.  Does anyone else feel that way too????

Afterwards I got a short massage for my neck as it was still playing up.

We had an impromptu BBQ at our place last night with 2 other couples and all our kids and some extra thrown in for good measure...16 in total.  I am a little over chicken as I find it gets stuck a fair bit so I got some salmon for the barbie and that was gorgeous....really nice.  One of my friends was talking about how she had put on 10 kg and what not and then threw this theory out to us....(by the way neither of these friends have noticed my loss which for 1 friend...who I would class as a bestie...is now starting to really annoy me...I have practically gone down 2 sizes and lost over 17 kg (37.4 lbs) so I would have thought she would have noticed....I mean the theory is it takes 10 kg or  22 lbs isn't it????)

Sorry....back to the theory.  She said a friend of hers had said that whatever weight you were stable at before kids so like in your twenties say, you would add 10kg after having kids and then another 5 kg for when you hit 40.  So that is 15kg (33lbs) after having kids and turning 40.  She asked me if I thought this was correct????  I said that I hadn't really gotten a stable weight since having my second child but if I looked at a weight that I could hold then that would stand true.  What do you guys think???? 

In my twenites I could hold steady at 63kg (138.6lbs) and after going up and down the scales too many times to count I know I can stay stable at around 78kg (171.6lbs) which is why I have set my worst result goal at this weight.  Now that is exactly 15 kg since I was in my twenties and  I have had children and turned 40.  I thought it was interesting.

I ordered this book and have read it and thought I would offer it up to any blogger out there who would like to read it.  It is about Kahliah Ali who is Muhammad Ali's daughter who struggled with her weight her whole life and finally got a lap band.  Her Dr's are Dr Ren and Dr Fielding who are also Jen's  , Catherine's , Yana's and Vanessa's Dr's...and Dr Fielding also has a lap band.

Now all you have to do is after you have finished reading it offer it up on your blog to pass onto another lap bander or dieter who may be interested in reading the story.  Also can you sign the front page so that when it finally does return to me I will know who enjoyed the book and have a record.  Just some fun.  So let me know if you would like me to mail it on to you....

Here is me today in my size 16 dress that finally fits again....what is it with the sizing though???  I feel this is a small 16 and always has been due to the buttons down the front....you don't want to be hanging out now do you???  My kids are so cute as they always say how nice I look...lucky mum here

Well that's all for now....glad to hear the newbie bandsters are basically recovering well and good luck to everyone in the Memorial Bathing Suit Challenge.

Take care

Sally xxx

Third Fill

Well yesterday I went for my Dr's for my 3rd  monthly visit and got a small fill of .5ml making my total fill 2.75ml (cc's are the same ) in a 10 ml band.  They were really pleased with me and said I had lost 8kg (17.6lbs) since my last visit.....I said that couldn't be right so we weighed me again and it seemed I had.  Now I know for a fact that I have probably only lost about 5kg (11lbs) and since they have just changed to the computer system from cardsI think that  my last weigh in weight was lost.  I would love to have lost that much but I know from the weight they had that they must have missed one.  Anyway, we ummed and ahhhed about whether I really need a fill since I am going well but as I had been hungry all day we decided to give me a small .5 ml fill.

Once again, I could feel it straight away with the water so all good here.  I am being very kind to it for a few days since I pb'ed so much on the last fill as I struggled getting used to it.  I said could I just get 0.1 ml and he said that it would make no difference at this stage as the small tiny fills made more difference further down the track when you are quite filled.

This is a diagram that I have drawn to show you what my Dr showed me

The first one shows how my band would probably look now and over time the stomach fat dissapears and that is why the band loosens...see how smal of a diffeence one ml would make to me now????  The second picture shows a further down the track band with more fill and how the 0.1 ml makes a much bigger difference.  I never want my opening  to be that tiny though so hence the are you kidding???

I also asked about how long the food actually stays in the little pouch and why if it is gone after 1/2 hour (when we are allowed to drink again) do we stay full for so long???  He said that the food really only stays there for about 2 mins and the 1/2 hour rule was actually a bit outdated...don't drink and eat in the same mouthful is more acurate as it makes the food more runny and the nerve won't register the mouthful.  He said to wait about 5 mins after eating and then it would be fine.  Who knew???  The reason we stay so full or more acurately satisfied  is because of where the band actually is and it leans against a nerve that sends messages to the brain that we are full and after about 25 or so bits of food or mouthfuls or whaterver pass against this nerve and it tells our brain that we are full.  How amazing...I hope I am not boring you but I found this info really great....

Now the other great thing was that there was a support group happening after the clinic shut at 6pm....I got talking (I am a major chatterbox...think back to my story about chatting on the shopping line) to another lady in the waiting room and found out it was on so I decided to stay even though I am not having any issues but it was nice to talk to other people about it since I know no-one with a band....except all of you of course.  One lady had lost 30kg (66lbs) since August whilst others had only lost 12 kg ( 26lbs) in 6 months.  This particular lady could eat anything and did.  She still binged etc and was quite large.  Another lady had had 7 fills and still no restriction.  It seemed I was going really really well and I felt embarrassed about it.  I then thought about all my blogging friends (I really do think of you as my friends now) and thought how amazing we are really doing.  I think having this support here is way better than the group.

I don't say it to make you feel bad if you are not losing but to let everyone know that there are heaps of people with a band who are losing it slowly and that is ok!!!!  Celebrate the success that we have because I would hate to be the lady who lost 12 kg and could still eat everything...I sort of don't see the point of the surgery if we don't work this tool we have and try to change our bad habits as well.  Does that make sense????  Or do you think I am being hard???  Comments please.....

Ok...to Nene and Work in Progress...the Sisterhood is in the mail...enjoy and you must posts pics of you wearing the clothes when they fit you...please.  I am also really excited because today I could finally get into Secret Diaries blog.  For some reason there were about 3 blogs I could not get into and my computer would freeze on them and Katherine's was one, Gilly's was another so I will have to try that again too.  Anyway, I can get in now and am so excited because she is another Aussie and is being banded today or yesterday....so good luck.  Also to Tessierose and Camille and Jacquie.  Hope you are recovering well.

This is a picture of me on Tuesday....I hate photos of me and think I always look bigger in them but anyway this was me in one of my old size 12 tops.  No way am I a size 12 but who cares...it fits and sure it is a little tight but I am wearing it again today...yay.  Why is my face still so fat...but my boobs are going down which I love.

Ok I better stop rambling for now.....I have to go back to canteen at the girls school and then try and make the pool blue again becuse it is so hot here today.  Then I am going to get a 1 1/2 week old kitten to feed for the rest of the day from work and take it my firends house who moved an hour away so will take the girls there after school and stay for dinner and then home again...another hour...take the kitten back to another girl at work and then get some sleep because last night I got home at 8pm after Tafe (college) all day and then the hours drive to my DR and the support group and the drive home again....got home at 8pm and fell asleep on the lounge after some wine and DH couldn't wake me up so I woke up freezing at 5.50am and crawled to bed...neadless to say my neck is sore and DH didn't put a blanket on me because he wanted me to wake up and come to bed....ahhhh!!!!

I must post more about my work and also wine in another post.

Take care

Sallyxxxx  (Yes I finally stopped talking...he he he)

Comparison Shots and more stuff fro the Sisterhood

The first photo is on the day of surgery and the second is today.  It doesn't look like 17 kg (37.84lbs) down though does it???

However I can see a huge difference in this one....even on the thighs.

Well ask and you shall receive....Gen asked for comparison shots and here they are.  How is that for service???

I can't see a huige difference in the first set but I can in the second lot.  I have gone from a tight 18 verging on 20 to a very snug 14 (and can just get those jeans on with a major muffin top and I suspect it is because they are super strecthed from being worn at a bigger size) to a loose 16.  Quite a few of my clothes are too big now...even the tops.  My work uniforms hang a little lower and drag on the ground whilst the top - a size 20 is swimming.

My bras have lost the extender and I have even bought some new ones in a size 16 again.  What a relief it was to throw that disgusting bra out.  I only had 2...and the t-shirt one had lost it's underwires...gross hey???  So many of my older clothes are fitting again too which is a huge confidence boost.

I have not had many comments from people but I do get a lot of people saying that I am looking great...so perhaps they can not work out why???  Most frustrating is 2 or my besties have not noticed at all.   I suppose this is because they see me all the time but it would still be nice if they noticed.

The one thing that has changed from before is that when I was dieting and losing weight previously I would think about it all day everyday and get annoyed at the scales and also if others did not notice.  But now I just go on with my life and accept that the weight is coming off but it is not the sole focus of my world.  Has anyone else found that???

I was thinking about how TJ mentioned on her blog that she is finding a little bit more of real self as the weight falls off.  I too am finding that.  I am finding that my REAL personality is starting to come back.  It seems that whenever I get heavier or above what I consider to be a good weight I lose my personality a little or in the  last case alot.  I feel very self conscious and feel that people are talking about how the weight is going on again.  I also don't feel like socialising for many reasons...not having anything to wear, not wanting people to see how much weight I have put on, feeling down in the dumps and not wanting people to see what I eat.

This too has changed heaps with the band.  I am feeling more confidant again and wanting to live life rather than hide out at home.  I have more energy and want to catch up with friends and family.  I am liking being myself again...and that is a huge joy.  It takes so much negative energy to hate yourself doesn't it???? And it is exhausting.  And believe me I loathed myself.  In fact about 9 months ago I was looking at ways to get out of feeling such loathing and pain again...I just felt like I couldn't go on.....thank goodness I stuck in there.

Finally,  I have 3 more items to pass onto the sisterhood.

I have these Capri pants in Black and also a pair in White.  They are from Suzanne Grae and are a size 18.  The black have been worn 3 times and the whitte about a dozen times.  They come down to just above your ankle and are very flattering especially on the tummy.  3 months ago they were so tight I needed DH to help me do them up.

This top is also from Suzanne Grae and is a size 14.  Now I was super surprised to see that as it fit me at around 100kg so I would say it is a size 16.  It has a billowy top gatherd at the waist and bat type sleeves that hang off the shoulder.  I have never worn it.  It is a nice green colour.

Let me know if you would like any of these....

Hope you are all well

Sally xxx

17.2 kg down.

Well I am with Cara....who can work out how this weight loss thing goes.  I am down another .6 kg  (1.32lbs) today to make it a total of 17.2 kg (37.84lbs) lost.  I can really tell the differerence.

I had decided to keep with the liquids for a bit after my tummy bug as i was finding solids kept coming back up...must be inflamed for the infection or bug I had.  I am much hungrier today and have had a protein shake, a yogurt, soup and a caramelo koala....I just felt like chocolate probably to help get my energy up.  Yesterday I spent another day in bed and slep half the day and all of the night and more.  Still feel listless today but took the girls to see Alice in Wonderland...

You what was funny though...after I had the Caramello Koala (caramel chocolate) I hid the wrapper.  I then thought about it and wondered why????  I have nmothing to feel guilty about...I chose to have it and I have only had one...so what is the problem.  NOTHING.... so I just threw it in the bin.   Some of our old habits just stick don't they.

I am slowly catching up on the blogs....it takes time though doesn't it.

Take care and talk soon

Sally xxx

Not a good way to get the Scales moving again!!!!

Well, I have been rather dissappointed at the scales lack of movement over the last week and a bit considering how little I have been eating.  I have started up the exercise again this week and even got up at 5.20 am on Thursday to go to the gym and do laps for 40 min.  It was quite strange bacuase I felt a little sick and thought I might vomit after a coughing attack on the way to pick my friend up and had some waves of nausea and 3 times I had to stop swimming after the same coughing attacks.

After the swim we got a coffee and I hit the loo and bang....explosive diarrheoa.  Well I got home and was making the kids lunch and again....off to the loo.  Both DH & DD1 had woken up on Monday night with vomiting and then DH got the runs.  I said to DH that I would just wait it out as I had college that day but I ended up in bed moaning and groaning and running to the loo and then the vomiting started.  Thank goodness the vomiting only hit 3 times and nothing came up because I hadn't eaten.  I would have worried for the band.  The worst is I missed a whole day at Tafe (college)...arghhhh)

Yesterday I still felt very weak and hardly ate and today I am down a kilo (2.2lbs) but still off food.  What  can eat that doesn't feel like being stuck or taste foul???  I feel like toast but tried that and stuck and that is awful when you are quesy anyway.

My next frustraion is that I was making great headway on the blogs through Google Rader and commenting only to find that after all my comments (2 hours worth) none of them showed up on your blogs....I can't catch a break.  So can someone tell me how I can comment ...so that you get them...through Google Reader...please.

Ok...I am bad to bed for a bit

Sallyxxx

Three Month Bandiversary

Three days late but never the less I have just passed my 3 month Bandiversary...Happy Band Day to me.  I am down 15.6kg (34.32 lbs) and in control of my life or so far so good.

So I suppose it is a good time to reflect on what I am doing well and what I am not....

Bandster Rules I live by:

Eat only when hungry:  I manage to do this most of the time and truly can't really get much down when I am not hungry...except wine!!!  I also try to choose something nutritious and good for me like fruit, protein and vegies.  Make those meals count!!!  There are not many!!!

Drink 30 minutes after meals:  I am really good at this except when out to dinner and I enjoy a glass of wine.  I just sip it whenever I like.

Take a multi vitamin every day:  No problem here either.  Each day I take my biotin vitamin for my hair and a multi as a minimum.  Most days I try fro 2 of each.

Exercise:  I have been averaging deep water aerobics about 3 times a week until my daughter got sick.  I love exercise so I am not worried about this one as when my foot allows me to do better i will be able to do more.

Eat Slowly & Stop when you are full:  I do this most of the time and if I forget or rush then I soon know about it!!!  Pb.....or stuck...no need to elaborate.

Staying in conact with my Dr/Clinic: To me this is a no brainer!!!

Avoiding slider foods:  I do this well.  Except for the shake but I chose that.  I only have yogurt with fruit.

Things I could do better:

Avoid liquids containing calories: Fail. But I choose to fail this. I like to have a protein shake every morning for breakfast. Sometimes if I am not careful I can get stuck on this. That way I know I start the day well and as I make it with milk I get around 25gm of protein. I usually then have another 4 meals. I do not eat that much..I think anyway. Wine....fail. The last 2 weeks have seen me slip back to having a drink every noght. I know about this old habit and more about that in another post.


So I think I am doing ok.  I have really tried to change my habits and occasionally fail...but hey that is part of life.  I am trying to live by my word Balance and have the odd treat.  But you know what...most the time I don't really feel like it.  I am happy with my weight loss overall except I have not moved for a while but am a little dissapointed considering how tight my band has been...however I am having the wine...still way way less than before.

In fact the scale showed a gain yesterday of .8kg (1.76lb) but it is gone today.  I knew it was temporary as I barely ate over the weekend...my friend even noticed.  I am hungrier today but will see how it goes before I get another fill as these last 3 weeks have been difficult to eat alot of the time.  I am indeed one of those lucky ones to have had restriction from Day 1....very lucky as I still only have 2.25 mls in my band.

Measurements:

17/3/10

Neck:  36cm
Arms:   30cm
Chest:  108cm
Waist:  111cm
Hips:  118cm
Legs:  64cm

14/12/09

Neck - 37
Left arm - 34
Right arm - 34
Chest - 127
Waist - 118
Hips - 127
Legs - not measured

I wish I had taken a measurement of my stomach obetween my boobs and waist...it would be a huge difference now.

Positives:

* I am more positive
* I am off my crutches and mostly out of my boot ( I am sure the weight loss is a big part of it)
* I no longer obsess about food or binge ...I do still think of food but in terms of what can I eat that is nutritious, band friendly etc
* I have lost 15.6 kg - over half way to my first worst weight goal and 1.6kg off my best weight half way point.
*  I am fitting into lots of my old clothes
*  I am not dieting
*  I feel like going out again and my real personality is returning. 
*  I want to live
*  I have some new bras.
*  I have 58 supporters of this blog
*  I am enjoying cooking again

Negatives:

*  I PB alot
*  Sometimes I don't enjoy my food because of the way it goes down....hard to explain but I just don't enjoy it

Well I have no regreats at the moment so it is a good place to be.

Thanks for all your support

Sally xxx